Good morning! I just love Word-Filled Wednesdays as hosted by Amydeanne, and Thankful Thursdays, hosted by the beautiful Iris!

Give thanks unto the LORD, call upon his name, make known his deeds among the people. 1 Chron 16:8

I’m combining by Thankful Thursday today with some additions to my 1000 gifts list (the numbers are to keep me straight on the 1000!). My heart is overflowing today so I’ll try not to let the list get too long!

• I am thankful that God the Father keeps showing me the gifts of His grace and His mercy no matter how many missteps I make. (11)
• I am thankful for the gift of waking up with a smile, knowing that I’ll start and finish my day safe in His arms. (12)
• I am thankful that God has given me the gift of courage to boldly step out and do the Two to Pray project. I don’t know if anyone will use it but I’m grateful to have listened to what He was so obviously was telling me to do. And maybe that was the whole point! (13)
• I am thankful that we have had the gift of a few days of beautiful fall weather here in Florida. Yes, I grumbled a bit about being cold but, truly, it has been glorious here this week! (14)
• I am grateful for the gift of online fellowship that there are always so many entries to WFW and TT that it usually takes me the whole week to read them. The gift of sharing people’s favorite pics and Scripture and hearing about the “thankfuls” in their lives is priceless and, since I’m poky about reading, it goes on for a whole week. Inspirational! (15)
• I’m thankful for the gift of my meds and that they are are kicking in! I feel so much better and I’m thankful for the gift of all the prayers that have been said for me. (16)

To read more Thankful Thursday posts, please visit Iris at Grace Alone.

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This is the weirdest thing and I can’t explain it at all but it has been building in me for some time. While I am waiting to see what my next step is, I feel called to serve in the form of prayer. Jesus told us that whenever or two or more are gathered, He is in their midst. Let me be more specific and quote the Scripture:

Matthew 18:19-20 says: Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven. For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.

So I am offering to partner in prayer with anyone who needs it. I don’t understand it, I don’t get it, but I’m gonna do it because I never would have come up with this idea on my own so it must be in God’s plan for me that I do this or at least to have the willingness to. If you have prayer requests, or know anyone who might, and need a prayer partner, please leave a comment (anonymous is fine) at Two To Pray.

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God doesn’t close a door without opening a window. I grew up with that phrase and I believe it. It looks like one chapter of my life is closing, for now at least, and that means another is about to open.

While I’ve been a SAHM the last few months, it looks like I’m going to have to transition back to being a WAHM (the AHM being necessary since I’m Studly’s caregiver). I’m fine with this although I have to say that I hope I don’t have to do medical transcription again (though I will if I have to!). We’re planning to let me continue with not working until about January. That will let me hopefully get my meds straightened out and get through an anniversary date in December (the bad kind) that is likely to be rough. And there’s the bonus of having winter break home with the kiddos!

I couldn’t explain why, if you held a gun to my head, but I have the oddest sense, a sureness even, that God is about to do something in my life.   I just have such a sense of peace about it which is unusual for me, being more the drama-queen type.  I have no idea in what area of my life it will be but there’s something definitely coming.  I had hoped, as I have rediscovered my Christian walk, that my little blog here would let me find some kind of ministry to do His work (and making a little $$ wouldn’t hurt either!) but maybe that was just my plan and not His.  I am going to carefully select some Amazon and Christianbook.com ads for books and music but, other than those which might be beneficial, I’ve been convicted that having ads here is wrong. This (my blog) isn’t that (a source of income). Everything in my gut is telling me that. So… I wait.

While I wait, though, to see what it is that is in store for me to earn money and, more importantly, for God to reveal His plan to me, I will serve Him and continue to be in prayer and study and fellowship with other women. There’s something that I am supposed to be doing while I wait. It’s a mission, for lack of a better word, and it’s simple and exciting all at once. While I write the next post all about it, I thought I’d leave you with this incredible song and some scenes from Fireproof which, if you haven’t seen yet, you’d better go.  I can’t believe it’s still in theaters here for next week!

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The topic over at the 160 Acre Woods today is Light — specifically focusing on the Light we can share with others as Halloween approaches. I went with light, but in sort of a different direction.

It’s Proverbs 4:18 But the path of the just is as the shining light, that shineth more and more unto the perfect day.

As I work and pray and study and read to get my Christian walk where it should be, I ran across this verse and it really struck me. His Way is the light and the more I walk in His way, the more I feel that glorious light shining down on me and in me and through me. Thank You, Father, for your glorious light.

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We all know the phrase “follow your heart.” It sounds sweet and mushy and everything but sometimes the heart can steer you wrong mostly because a lot of the feelings we experience might be only temporary. If we are following those temporary feelings we might be making the wrong move. Like the past winter when my heart was broken. If I had followed my heart, I would have left my husband and my marriage. It would have been the wrong move. I would have regretted it and never have been able to undo it.

The Love Dare challenge focuses on leading your heart. Biblical submission focuses on submitting yourself to your husband and doing what is good for him. The challenges of the Love Dare are, in my opinion, progressively more difficult and require more from me in terms of thought and prayer and setting my heart to rights before proceeding on to the next dare. I’ve made a commitment to myself, for the sake my husband and my marriage, that I won’t just blindly go through each dare without giving it 100%. Until I can do that, I don’t move on.

So I have been a little stuck. Lessons I thought I had really “gotten” as it turns out this week I hadn’t. So I’m going back and reflecting and praying and re-reading. It is hard to be loving and giving when the person whom you’re loving and to whom you’re giving is acting like a jerk . It’s hard to open your heart and love fully when you know there’s a really good likelihood it’s going to get stomped on, at least in the short term. In my heart, it’s like eating something and expecting chocolate cake (great, now I’m jonesing for cake and I haven’t even had breaky yet!) only to find dirt and worms and bitter seasonings.

So I just keep remembering the joy of our wedding day and all of the bright promise that it held, how certain I was that marrying Studly had been the best decision of my life. And I keep going back to these Bible verses in Matthew 25:34-40:

Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world: For I was an hungered, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me. Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink? When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee? Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee? And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

Kind of puts my little hurt feelings into some real perspective, wouldn’t you agree?

The last two days have been heavy caretaking days and Studly’s temper has been quite short due to the pain. Monday I have to admit that I got defensive and argued back with him and generally made a mess. Monday night I cried and I didn’t sleep because this is not the Willow I want. It isn’t the Christian walk or the marriage I want. I knew I had blown it big-time. Tuesday I prayed. I decided to lead my heart and do the things I did out of love for Studly and love for the Lord because He told me to do them. I had to stop a couple of times and remember the end goal and pray myself back onto the right path. And ya know what? At bedtime last night, before I closed my eyes, I had chocolate cake in my heart.

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FUN!

My mom was a cool mom. It was great. She was 31 when I was born and 32 when my younger sister was born. While that age is pretty common now for having kids back then she was considered an “older parent.” Lil sis and I were… um … surprises. Like reconciliation surprises because my mom and dad had gotten divorced while big sis was little and after they got back together we came along. Anyhoo…

When we were little, Mama listened to WGUS, our local country station there in Disgusta Augusta, GA (aka the “dodge” most teens were looking to get the heck out of!). When knowing all the lyrics to all the songs by Loretta and Lynn and Waylon, Willie and the boys made my lil sis and me uncool, Mama was with the program and switched to our local rock station, WBBQ. She embraced it! When we would clamor for the music in the car to be louder, she’d turn it up to deafening!

By the time we got to junior high (it was still junior high back then, not middle school) and kids were having parties, we had moved into a really nice tri-level house (I still miss that house!) with two sets of stairs for us to run up and down (that lasted about a day!) and it was completely awesome with a den in the basement that had BLACK AND RED SHAG CARPET. I kid you not. So we had black-and-red furniture, including bean bag chairs, a custom-built, fully stocked bar that my stepdad’s son-in-law built for him, and the piece de resistance (sorry, can’t figure out how to do the little characters here) was A MIRRORED DISCO BALL hanging from the ceiling! My friends all thought my house rocked!

Disco… what can I say about disco except that I loved it and I miss it still! The outfits, the dances, the music … they were FUN! And along came… the hustle. Who do you think was the first person my crowd knew who could do the hustle? Or the bump? My mama, that’s who! She taught me (okay, she tried to teach me, I have 2 left feet) and my friends how to do all of that stuff! She completely rocked — and I mean that literally!

And so ends remembrance post #2

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If you are anything like me, you have lists. Grocery lists, Christmas lists, to-do lists, who-has-to-be-where-when lists… and half the time you need a list to keep track of your lists! Well, I can’t say that I’m getting rid of my lists (they’re sort of a part of me!) but I am starting a new one that I want to take precedence over all of the rest: A list of 1000 blessings in my life. That’s right, 1000 things, circumstances, people in my life for which I am grateful. I got the idea from Ann Voskamp at Holy Experience. It looks like this movement is really old, started 5 years or so ago. But Ann is still keeping it going! Wouldn’t you like to join in? Visit her site and she has all the deets!

My list will begin with God and end with God. I can’t vouch for what the stuff in the middle might look like!

1. I am grateful that God loved us enough to give His Son to die for us.
2. I am grateful that Jesus loved the Father and us enough to sacrifice Himself.
3. I am grateful that my mom had amazing pain control right up until the end.
4. I am grateful for the times I shared with her.
5. I am grateful for the smell of freshly mown grass.
6. I am grateful for the sweet smell of little babies.
7. I am grateful for music. I can’t imagine my life without it.
8. I am grateful for my beautiful husband.
9. I am grateful for my sisters and the certain knowledge that they are always on my side.
10. I am grateful for hot bubble baths to relax my tired body at the end of the day.

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How often do you forget to be still and listen for and to God? How often do you allow “being busy” to keep you from quietly waiting to see in which direction He wants you to go? For me it’s often. Too often. I don’t think being still is a part of our society anymore. It’s a shame. Mostly I am still in the quiet of the morning before everyone is up. I cherish and treasure those moments. It’s when I do my best listening and waiting.

Here’s a part of a lyric from the beautiful song, You Raise Me Up:

When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;

When troubles come and my heart burdened be;

Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,

Until you come and sit awhile with me.

I love this song, particularly as sung by Selah. Maybe it’s because I know how Todd Smith and his sister Nicol Sponberg were going to be tried and tested by losing their beautiful babies within weeks of one another. Certainly that makes the lyrics more poignant. Maybe it’s the pictures. Maybe it’s that their parents were missionaries in Africa. Maybe it’s just the incredible voices all 3 of them have!

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This is a great set of Bible verses!

Ephesians 4:22-24 That ye put off concerning the former conversation the old man, which is corrupt according to the deceitful lusts; And be renewed in the spirit of your mind; And that ye put on the new man, which after God is created in righteousness and true holiness.

Be renewed in the spirit of your mind… a new way of thinking!

4:25-27 Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour: for we are members one of another. Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath: Neither give place to the devil.

Members one of another. That means that every time I judge someone, even some little petty thing, I am harming myself. And how many times have I, in the past, gone to bed angry about one thing or another thing, or resentful, or with just general agitation. I know I don’t sleep well those nights because it’s like those things just take root and grow and magnify. How much better to forgive or to let go!

And here are specifics regarding our behaviors:

4:28-32 Let him that stole steal no more: but rather let him labour, working with his hands the thing which is good, that he may have to give to him that needeth. Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers. And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

These verses blew me away, particularly because when I think of sin my first thought is of “doing”. Active sins such as lying, stealing, etc. are what come immediately to my mind. Look at the passive sins addressed here: bitterness, wrath, anger, clamour. These aren’t actions; they’re negative feelings that we can have in tiny little corners of our hearts that grow and fester and can lead to the more active sins!

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